How to Deal with Middle-Age Unemployment

My friend was laid off with only one week’s notice.

The company only agreed to pay half a month’s salary. My friend said that if I don’t give N+1, I will see the court. After 3 days of negotiation, I finally got the compensation and left.

I have to sigh with emotion that we 35+ middle-aged people are high-risk animals in the workplace. No matter how hard we work overtime, we cannot escape the fate of being hand-picked when we are on the verge of layoffs.

The layoffs are not groundless. My friend’s salary is the highest among editors. She doesn’t have a lot of business, is the oldest, has slow knowledge metabolism, can’t keep up with the team rhythm, and is not cost-effective.

The female executive is unmarried and has no children, and she is decisive in doing things. In the eyes of these middle-aged women, they hold a parent meeting and ask for leave when their children are sick. Their brains and efficiency are not as good as those of post-95s.

Colleagues just didn’t expect that it took only one week from the KPI talk to the actual layoff.

She said that the monthly payment for the house at home is 20,000 yuan, and her husband’s industry used to be highly profitable, but now it has fallen sharply. Without this job, the family’s financial pressure has only increased.

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Illustrator: Fireart Studio

Middle-aged people are pushed away in the turbulence of life. When they open their eyes, they are all people who rely on you. No matter how optimistic people are, their hearts are at a loss.

I saw “unemployed middle-aged people pouring into Starbucks” on Weibo before, which is a realistic portrayal.

These unemployed middle-aged people carry their computers and sit in Starbucks for a day, avoiding the discovery of their family members. They also have to calculate the daily commute time and the corresponding number of steps, pretending to be in place.

In the comment area, I also saw a programmer who was laid off by a big factory say that in order not to be discovered by his wife, he transferred his private money to his wife every month according to the previous monthly amount, and worked hard for 10 years. I only found a job in a few months, and I am glad that I had the habit of saving money before.

The difficulty of middle-aged people is that they don’t want their family members to worry about them. No matter how much pressure they have, they just want to let themselves bear the burden.

When people reach middle age, they have to face reality and bear risks. How to calmly face a life that may go downhill requires a different way of thinking.

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The cruelty of reality often strikes in middle age.

A woman in her forties, after the epidemic, her foreign trade company closed down, her husband fell ill and lost her labor force, and her child went to school. She was asking for money every day when she opened her eyes.

She is used to sitting in the office, so she opened Didi, which can maintain the expenses of the family. She said happily that she still has a healthy body.

There is a saying in Cantonese that “the horse dies and walks on the ground”. Faced with the gap, calm down and do everything you can. Maybe you can fight a bloody road for life, even if it is a difficult road.

It is easy to feel pity and self-pity for the setbacks of middle age.

A friend worked overtime at 10:30 in the evening, and saw that a friend in the circle of friends could go shopping and walk the dog after get off work at 4:30. She wanted to ask the world why she was so difficult, and began to feel the sadness of life Shun.

This is the feeling of misfortune that is easy to produce after comparison.

If you are lost for no reason, maybe you are comparing yourself with others.

I saw a saying that if you think a person is very happy, it means that you are not familiar with him, extreme luck is rare, and middle-aged people are not a feather in the ground.

We are all ordinary people, others are not as good as you imagined, and you are not as bad as you imagined.

Occasionally some small loss is normal, remember not to compare with others, and you don’t have to please others, live yourself well, live a fulfilling life, it will be a sunny day.

Focusing on yourself, taking care of your life and work, and living your own small life well is a great skill.

A middle-aged reader asked Chizuko Ueno that she was still poor after 20 years in the company and wanted to resign all the time, but she still does it now. She lives at her parents’ house and takes 1 hour and 40 minutes to go to work every day.

Because of poverty, the clothes on the commute every day become crumpled, and the lunch box at noon is also very shabby. I am very unhappy every day and have no friends. She asked Ueno Chizuko how to deal with these breakdowns.

Chizuko Ueno’s answer was very long, and there were two sentences in it, which were especially helpful to me.

The first sentence is that people should look down and be satisfied with the status quo. This middle-aged girl has a stable job and can still live in her parents’ house. She is better than many people. If she only looks up and compares herself with others, she will only feel sorry for herself and feel that everyone in the world has failed her.

The second sentence is that work is for income, not for meaning. If there is no better job opportunity, stay here even if you are hated. This is also a wake-up call for us middle-aged people, don’t make naked speeches without any preparation, work is not about being unhappy, work is for life.

The reason I resigned naked was that the leader didn’t like me, I was not happy here, and the work was boring and meaningless.

In fact, no job is perfect. It is of great significance to keep a job in middle age.

I accepted my ordinary, ordinary, no matter what kind of work, it is great to stick to it.

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Unemployed in the middle age, you can still deliver food and open Didi, but all kinds of money-making things are basically in good health.

If you are in good health, even in the face of difficulties, you will feel that you have the strength to deal with them, and you will have the courage to overcome difficulties.

My friend got promoted, but the nature of the job is special. The mobile phone has to be turned on 24 hours a day. I don’t know when there will be an emergency. Every night, it seems like a sword of Damocles is hanging over my head.

After a month of headaches, I went to see a doctor, saying that it was caused by high mental stress + poor sleep + long-term high-intensity work.

Because of this reason, my friend almost wanted to ask for a change of position and didn’t want to be a leader anymore.

Middle-aged people who can withstand high intensity and earn the money they should earn have to ask whether their bodies can pass the test.

If you don’t have a good job, having a good body is at least something to be grateful for.

The hard part about being out of a job may not just be a loss of income, but it can also leave you with self-doubt.

At this time, you must take care of your emotions.

Talk to your family or friends in time to tell your plight and seek comfort and support.

I don’t suggest you pretend to go to work like a middle-aged man in Starbucks, it will make you more depressed, lonely, and even easy to get into a dead end.

Unemployment should not be a mental illness. You should open your heart and unload the burden before you can start again.

No matter how difficult it is to speak, you must tell your partner. What you need most at this time is understanding and encouragement. The meaning of husband and wife is that they go the same way through wind and rain.

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A relative’s recent start-up company has difficulty in turnover, and he can’t borrow money everywhere. He said that he regretted spending money indiscriminately in the past few years. I saw that in his circle of friends in the past few years, he bought famous cars, traveled abroad, and bought famous brands. very.

Unexpectedly, middle-aged people will return to poverty very quickly, and they still have to accumulate food to prevent hunger.

Now there is a low material desire life. Many people used to buy everything when they went to the mall, but now they just eat.

Everyone said that money is not easy to earn now. They used to believe that the future would be better, but now they only hope that there will be enough cash flow to cover the bottom line when they are in trouble in the future.

Turn your life into a “low-consumption” mode, reduce unnecessary material desires and obsessions, and simplify your life by cutting out the complexity. After all, when people reach middle age, the low tide will come sooner or later.

In the days when you are not enslaved by material things, you can control your life and use the balance to adjust your life.

Writer Zijin Chen resigned and went home to write, deciding to lead a life of low material desires.

He puts 300,000 yuan in Alipay and only spends the interest on it. He stays at home every day and doesn’t buy new clothes. He limits his consumption to 500 yuan a month, which is only used for eating and smoking.

Maintaining a low material desire can make people more free, not too much restricted by money, and more confident in insisting on themselves.

Of course, low material desires do not mean buying cheap things, but buying what you need and living a streamlined and quality life.

Losing a job can be scary, but there are things you can do to bring order back to your life.

List all your expenses and sources of income, determine how much you need to cover your basics like housing, utilities, food, and transportation, plan your finances, and live on less.

Of course, it can’t be too bitter. Romain Rolland said in “John Christopher”, you can’t eat too much bitterness, too much, and a person’s heart will dry up.

Live a decent life within your means and don’t make yourself look miserable.

The girl above said that her clothes became crumpled, unfashionable, and shabby during her daily commute, and the food in her lunch box was dry and poor.

She asked Ueno Chizuru if she wanted to dress herself up, eat better, and make others think of herself.

Chizuko Ueno sees through the problem at a glance, and feels that girls do not distinguish between what is within their abilities and what is beyond their abilities. If you want to dress yourself up, you can buy second-hand goods or fast-fashion clothes. You can become fashionable with less money. If you want to eat well Well, you can order more dishes for cooking at night, which is within your ability.

People who know how to live, even if they are struggling, can live with a simple sense of prosperity.

Set a greedy day for yourself every month, satisfy a small desire you want to achieve, make yourself happy, have time to dress up, and keep a neat appearance, which is a good face.

No matter who you are, you can’t compete with the years, and you can’t run the time. Everyone will usher in middle age.

Although I have foresight, I still try my best to live every sunrise and sunset. If one day I am unlucky and lose my job, I will try my best. I believe God will make other arrangements for me.

People who live well today will make a steady profit no matter what.